Friday, July 14, 2006

Mission...Almost Impossible

Why is it that anytime I'm getting ready to leave town, or be away from my home, my OCD kicks in?!? I say that tongue-in-cheek because anyone that knows me, knows that I in no way, shape or form, exhibit OCD. Just a peek at my house would send any real person with even the slightest OCD over the edge, I'm sure of it! The sheer fact that I'm sitting here typing this, rather than running around like a chicken with my head cut-off, is miracle enough. It's just that when I know I'm going to be gone for more than 24 hours, I shift from the "I don't care how my house looks, I'm not going to stress out over it" woman, to "Oh my God! I need to finish the laundry, fold & put everything away, sweep & mop the floors, and every last dish must be washed & put away" crazy woman!!! My stress level rises to it's absolute highest, and my kids know that it's time to run & hide. Hubby disappears too! It's the strangest thing...

I'm supposed to be getting ready to leave for a weekend-long MOPS retreat today, but I'm forcing myself to sit & blog about my 'problem'. I'm doing so in hopes of finding another mommy or 2 (or just 1, really) that can feel my pain, and relate to my OCD-ness. I need to know that there is another mommy out there that totally loses control, and feels compelled to have her house in perfect condition before vacating the premisses for even the shortest span of time.

I think my problem stems from a number of things - the first being my paranoid mind. Do you really want to know what rolls through this brain in my head? "What if I leave, and something happens to me? My family & friends will come to my home and find that I live a life of clutter and mess. My husband won't be able to function because all of the clothes will be in the hamper, or worse, clean in the basket, and wrinkled beyond all recognition". That's it! Really, that's why I become this posessed, crazy woman. Then, of course, there is the "While I'm gone, my kids need to be dressed in clean clothes, not left to run around the house (and/or yard) in their underwear or jammies" feeling. That one sends a shiver straight up my spine! To think that my neighbors would see my kiddos running around with hair in their eyes (Morgann) or sticking straight up in the air (Alex & Ian), still dressed in their jammies or skivies at 2PM makes me want to cry. Why? I'm anal retentive when it comes to appearances I guess. Not the fake, 'I want to put on a show and make people think we're someone that we're not' sort of appearance, but the 'even though mommy isn't home, hubby is fully capable of running the house with one hand tied behind his back' appearance. I know, I know! I'm a sad, sad shell of a person!!! I'm sinking in my chair as I type this, um...errr...confession. I know I'm expecting allot from a man that works 40+ hours a week, away from the house. To think that he'd really care about something so small and insignificant makes me feel badly. But, at the same time, it's not small & insignificant to me. So, seeing as how I am super-woman, it is my duty to be sure to give this man that I love every opportunity to fulfill my hopes & wishes while I'm away.

So this means, leaving the house in some semblance of order, with clean dishes, a fridge/freezer stocked with easy to heat & serve meals, clean clothes put away in their appropriate place...and a sister-in-law willing to come over to be sure the kiddos are dressed and well-fed :)

My only real demand for hubby? "Please be sure the dishes are in the dishwasher when I come home...oh yeah, and that no one runs out into the middle of the street!" (but, I digress!!! - there's a story behind that, but I dare not go there right now.)

*I love you my sweet man and appreciate your willingness to let me leave for a weekend of fun with the girls!!! You're wonderful and I truly appreaciate all you do for us :) So, about those dishes...



1 comments:

cori said...

okay...just one question...was it me you were refering to when you mention, and I quote, "I'm doing so in hopes of finding another mommy or 2 (or just 1, really) that can feel my pain, and relate to my OCD-ness. I need to know that there is another mommy out there that totally loses control..."

- you already KNOW that's me! I can relate to any OCD feeling about anything! But thank you for your kindness and discreetness by not inserting my name in there instead. ;) What a true friend you are!